RebuildingI’ve said it over and over; writer is who I am, author is what I do. Well, these days it’s more like: writer is who I am, stare-at-blank-pages-and-watch-my-amazon-ranking-decrease-by-the-nanosecond is what I do. I am a writer. No one can take that away from me. But in terms of writing to finish the multiple novels I have in progress, I’m not writing. Football teams get rebuilding years, so why can’t I? This, as in 2015, is my rebuilding year. I came out of the gate strong – a novel (or more) a year from 2008-2012, all of which were published in some form. I spent the entire year of 2013 editing my most recent failure, I mean novel, which was published in December of that same year…and I never really got back on the wagon. Publishing that book was the worst experience of my young writing career and left me jaded, bruised and certain that I, in fact, was not good enough to be an author. Yes, I spent a solid 12 months feeling sorry for myself. What can I say? I have a hard time letting things go.

To be fair, life has changed me too. I’m not the starry-eyed girl that I once was and now know there is no such thing as a story-book happily ever after. There’s ‘we might not kill each other and are too stubborn to just let things go’ and ‘I’m very attracted to you but it would be great if you didn’t speak or have an opinion’ and maybe, if you’re lucky, ‘we get along pretty well and still find each other’s thoughts and feelings relevant.’ Needless to say, love isn’t a go-to plot point for me these days. Now, I’m more about finding yourself in the blackness of life – carving out your little portion of forever and finding a shred of peace in the madness of existence. So I carve away, rebuilding something that could someday resemble a soul and read books like, ‘How To Fix Your Novel’ and ‘Writer’s Doubt’ both of which are very good, by the way.

I imagine this is what those who are truly mad must feel like when they stop taking their medication because they ‘feel fine’ and don’t need it anymore. I do need to write, but I just…can’t. Random thoughts jumble in my head at night when I try to sleep, odd words spill out into the emails and content of my day job and people I’ve never met are angry with me for refusing to finish their story. What if the sad truth of the matter is there is nothing left within me to share? What if the sad truth is…there never was?

Like I said – a rebuilding year.


I’m happy to announce that I’ve signed a contract with Crescent Moon Press ( to publish my new novel, Playing With Fire. While this will be my sixth published novel, it will be my first in hard copy so the process is all new for me this time around. My release is set for early 2014 and I can’t wait to get started with the process. I mean, I’m sure I’ll drag Eleanore with me to Lady K’s desk and cry that my editor hates me or call my sister and sob into the phone at some point, but I’m excited nonetheless. 
Playing With Fire is a New Adult, Urban Fantasy that blends history and fiction, creating an epic tale through one family’s path to forgiveness and one race’s desire to chose unity over extinction. Look for more about the book as we get closer to publication. I’ll release the blurb and cover when I have permission from CMP. For now you should check out the links below, like and follow accordingly, and spread the word! If all goes well, two books will follow this one – but only time will tell.
You guys. YOU GUYS. I’m going to be in print. I had some back and forth discussion with CMP before signing; asking questions and whatnot and finally I just had to ask, ‘Are you sure?’ Because…really? Me? You want to publish – in print – something I’ve written? Her response?  
‘Lol. Yes. We loved it. You have a fantastic voice.’  
I do? I mean…yeah, I do! 😉 Over the moon doesn’t describe how I feel in my heart. Thank you all for sticking with me and I hope you will enjoy Playing With Fire knowing I couldn’t have done it without each and every one of you.
For everyone still working at it; still struggling with the first draft of their first novel, do not give up. Turn the world off and write for you. Write the story that’s in your heart and know that someone, somewhere needs it in their heart too.